Douche and Turd

I hear a lot of talk about "rocking the vote". Around late October/November, everyone is encouraged to get out there and vote for who should be the next President.

Only one problem: by that point, it's usually too late. They're the general elections, chosen between two idiots, two pussies, two nutcases, or some combination thereof.

The primaries are of utmost importance. I know, I know, "but no one votes in the primaries". And that would be the reason why a lot of people didn't vote in the general election.

Think back, if you will, to 2004. Who did the Democrats elect for the primaries? Why, John Kerry, a man whose entire political platform seemed to be "I'm not Bush, and I'm very good at it."

Does anybody else remember a 2004 South Park episode entitled "Douche and Turd"? Well, if you don't, here's a basic summary:
They were going to have a new mascot, and it was going to be between two write-in suggestions: a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich. Everyone seemed to be getting into the whole thing, and taking sides. Stan was the one person who didn't care, saying he was choosing between "a douche and a turd". There were obvious parallels: Douche=Kerry, Turd=Bush. And the message was: you don't have to vote if you don't want to.

Well, if people had VOTED in the PRIMARIES, maybe it wouldn't BE between a douche and a turd, eh?

In fact, I'm going to say it: Whatever party you belong to, vote in the primaries. If you have to choose between voting in the primaries and voting in the general elections, vote in the primaries. Why?

Well, if more people voted in the primaries, maybe every candidate running for every party would be the most qualified person for the job. Maybe, just maybe, we'll get an election that, rather than choosing between a douche and a turd, would be like choosing between chocolate ice cream and chocolate mousse: awesome either way. And maybe, even with all the voter apathy on the general elections (which, by the way, wouldn't be as prevalent with GOOD candidates), the person that DID win would represent the actual wishes of the American people.

Then again, maybe the general election will be between Mitt Romney and Hilary Clinton. And I'm sure we all want that.